My Passion for Pink!

Most everyone who meets me through my volunteer work with Rikki's Refuge knows I am a huge animal lover and rescue advocate. Compassion for those weaker and more helpless than ourselves is the most supreme of human virtues in my opinion. But one thing some people who know me may *not* know is that not only is my mother a breast cancer survivor but that I, too, am a survivor of 12 years.

My story began innocently enough with me finding a lump in my right breast that just didn't seem "right".  Like many women, I ignored it for a little while. I knew it would be a hassle with insurance and doctors anyway. It wasn't until my husband (at the time my fiance') INSISTED I see a doctor about it that I learned this was a lot more serious than just a little discomfort.

With fellow queens at the Relay For Life Franklin County Walk 

My regular physician referred me to an oncologist but by that time the "lump" I had was progressing in size. I started off with an initial diagnosis of DCIS and wound up with a stage 2a sized tumor being excised from my body in May of 2001. This is where the insurance industry failed me...between the delays in testing and authorizing the surgery, I lost a lot of time waiting. I had BEGUN my quest to find out what was wrong back in January that year. Being only 29 at the time, my PPO would not pay for a needed diagnostic mammogram OR ultrasound. Even though my physician could clearly feel what I was talking about too, I wound up being put through a horribly painful biopsy and subsequent surgery that took place much later than it should have been. All because the carrier didn't want to pay for an $800 test which I wound up paying out of pocket for to confirm if my suspicions were correct. Only after I took charge of my health did I receive the referral I needed to have surgery.

This made me mad.

I began to wonder, how many other mothers of young children were facing the same fears? Challenges with the insurance process? Need for medical care they couldn't afford either? Mind you I was a divorced mother of a 2nd grader who desperately needed her mommy to raise her. I couldn't afford to be selfish and ignore the symptoms any longer when I realized it wasn't about me anymore.

Over the years since, I have worked with various events to help raise awareness and most importantly, funds as well, to change this reality. The law has changed in Virginia to allow for more coverage and hopefully steps will continue to be made to address the "Medicaid Donut Hole" which is the group of women (and men) too rich for Medicaid but too poor to afford the cost of copays (or even entire services) against what it takes to survive. Most are the "working poor" and I was once one of them. An $800 test is simply unrealistic when you make $30,000 a year with kids. Even a $250 copay is pretty much the same.

What to do? Well for one thing, I recently went to visit with legislators at the State Capitol to discuss with a group of like-minded supporters the need for more funding for these women, ESPECIALLY for diagnostic tests. When I had my test done we learned what I could feel represented only about 1/3 of what was really going on deep in my body. Too many times when a woman physically feels a tumor, it's progressed and too late to stop without multiple rounds of chemo, if at all. I was incredibly lucky.

No woman's life should be reduced just to a matter of being lucky.

So in addition to my passion for animal rescue, I work with Susan G. Komen volunteering at races and events as well as support the Virginia Breast Cancer Foundation in their awesome work. This is my platform that led me to compete and win in the Pink Queens For Life pageant. I conclude a year of service as their Survivor Ambassador this week and the journey has taken me to meet so many other women with similar stories. Survivors in their 20's and 30's, considered "too young" to be at risk. My daughter Alanna, who I am beyond proud of, is this year's Miss Relay For Life and has volunteered at numerous events alongside me to help champion the cause for a cure. With a grandmother, great aunt and mother having had this condition, she may one day be at risk herself and we plan to test for the BRCA gene. At 18 she faces the possibility of the same fears I had to meet head on because we don't have the answers yet.

It's not a legacy I'm willing to leave her.
And that's why I'm Passionately Pink about a world without cancer.

Pink Queens For Life Survivor Ambassador 2012
It's been a wonderful honor to be your representative! 

Time For Updates!

So much has happened since my last blog post! After crowning my successor at East Coast USA, I decided to enter the Mrs. Virginia International pageant that February. I competed in Roanoke, VA where I won the Interview and Onstage Question portions of the pageant, placing 1st runner up! Below are two photos I took from the event:

Amber Wandtke, the new Mrs. Virginia International competes this week in Chicago...so as her 1st runner up, I'm keeping my fingers crossed! Either way, I know she'll do great and represent the Commonwealth well. :) Here's a link to her blog as she continues her journey: http://www.amberwandtke.com/ 

Just a few months later, I was approached by the Susan G. Komen organization to attend a taping of the new show "Total Divas" with the WWE Divas as one of the local survivors being interviewed for the series! Being a total WWE fan already (I served as a ring valet for the Iron Sheik for a match back when I was Miss Virginia Galaxy 2002...good times!), this was a truly thrilling experience! 

I was able to meet two other survivors whose stories were also compelling and I think the taping reflected us in a great light while bringing attention to the need for affordable testing and early detection, part of my Passionately Pink platform I've been working with for years. Here are some photos from the taping...the series debuts this month so keep an eye out for E! TV...the link to our interview on their website is here: https://community.wwe.com/hope/gallery/divas-meet-susan-g-komen-honorees-richmond-va-photos

Every Ending is Someone Else's New Beginning

The Queen's Final Tea with the outgoing 2012 crew...

This past weekend I traveled to Portsmouth for a bittersweet but happy moment...I went to the VA State East Coast USA finals to crown my successor as my reign is over and another young lady's about to begin. I had planned to go down for the day to help out and crown when I received a call the night before that a judge had gotten ill with the flu and asking if I wouldn't mind filling in to judge the pageant?

Of course I said yes, knowing how much hard work these ladies put into winning these events and it was a wonderful pageant. We saw gorgeous girls from as young as 5 months up to age 22...I'll admit I was a *little* disappointed that there weren't any "over 40" gals like myself this time around but the quality of the competition was fabulous nonetheless! Shows like Toddlers & Tiaras really don't do justice to the fantastic systems like ECUSA that encourage every girl to be their best and reward BOTH participation AND success onstage. I think you need both to help the contestants grow...participation awards reward the courage it takes just to even get on stage for some newer contestants, and the higher titles and crowns encourage ongoing improvement. It really is a win-win situation for those competing.

Here are a few photos, one was with Mr. Tim our emcee (The Voice of Pageants!) who had been helping me with tips to improve my performance as a pageant & event hostess and the other was a group shot where one of the moms caught me trying to get everyone organized for the group shot! Think of "cat herding" with the little ones and the bright lights and you get the picture LOL!

Congrats to all the winners this weekend and esp to Summer Fant, who I crowned as my successor for the Pro Supreme title for Virginia! I hope she has a wonderful year!

With Mr. Tim Whitmer, the "Voice of Pageants" after a long day working together!

Catching our last little lady before she runs off for the final photo! We managed to get a great group shot though :) 

2013 Breast Cancer Lobby Day at the Capitol

Yesterday I had the honor of attending the annual Breast Cancer Lobby day at the Capitol with the Virginia Breast Cancer Foundation as an advocate and spokesperson. What an interesting experience! We met up at 9am to discuss the pending vote on Medicaid Expansion and the Every Woman's Life initiatives and then broke off into small groups to go one-on-one with various delegates of the House and Senate to talk about the upcoming vote and our position in general. Here I am with two of my friends while we were waiting to be recognized during the House meeting:

With Dana & Lynda, from the Fall BraZaar  team

This wasn't a "glamorous" event, we had work to do. Luckily my group got the pleasure of meeting with the Speaker of the House Delegate Howell who it turns out has a wife who is also a breast cancer survivor and a very passionate supporter of programs to help women in similar situations. It was absolutely humbling to be able to share my own story about the gap in our healthcare and insurance that I faced 12 years ago and to in turn hear from my elected representative the things he's done and plans to do to help prevent just that sort of thing from happening in the future. One thing I learned is we've come a LONG way just in 10 years in caring for the newly diagnosed and reaching lower-income woman...but the other side of the coin is that death rates aren't declining nearly as fast.

To relate, my own story is that I was a divorced single mom, only 29, when a suspicious lump that I'd been wondering about began to get larger. My fiance (now husband) at the time encouraged me to go get checked out. I did but my insurance would not pay for a definitive mammogram, citing I wasn't 40 yet and the odds of it being anything other than fibrocycstic were slim. This mind you with a mother who has had a mastectomy and a great-aunt who died from breast cancer.

I put off my exam for almost 3 months, I didn't have $800 out of pocket. Finally at my fiance's insistance I put it on a credit card and sure enough, there was a tumor. Well at that point the insurance decided they might pay something after a needle biopsy confirmed findings. I had an excision 2 weeks later but by this time what started as DCIS was progressing towards Stage I. I had a tumor the size of a "golf ball" per the surgeon, one very close to my lymph nodes under my arm.

I was lucky. They caught it in time. But how many women in similar circumstances HAVE a credit card to put $800 on? Why should they have to? And more importantly, how many may have died from metastatic cancer who had they been able to afford the diagnostic screening caught it in time instead? I "did everything right" and did my self-exams and yet the system initially failed me.

That is unacceptable, to let poorer women die in America, waiting for care that could save them.

It was because of this I decided to attend this event and I have worked with various organizations to further not only awareness but research into this deadly disease. The expansion of the Medicaid Act in Virginia if delayed will cost our state $5 million dollars a DAY in lost Federal funds, something that could literally spell the difference between staying open and closing hospital doors in rural counties. Sad to say, the more remote areas like Tazewell, Rappahannock, Mecklenburg take the hit much more than even those in inner-city Richmond and the surrounding areas.

We got to speak with five delegates before being recognized on the House floor by Delegate McQuinn, also a survivor herself. Five more voices hopefully for those who don't have one right now until a cure is found. To learn more, visit this wonderful organization at www.vcbf.org 

Go Red For Women today...Feb 1st!

Today, Feb 1st is the annual National Wear Red Day for the American Heart Association. Great timing, not only for Valentine's Day (aren't we all trying to find that one red outfit to wear 2/14?) but also because winter tends to encourage being indoors and many people put on a little extra "winter weight" from the colder, longer days. Obesity and heart disease are linked and while genetic factors can't be prevented, lifestyle ones can be.

For my part, I am fortunate that a few years back I bought a small indoor treadmill at Costco for a few hundred dollars in lieu of a gym membership that year and it has paid forward many, many times over! Anytime it's too cold/wet/dark/boring/crowded to go to a gym or hit the court I have no excuse not to plop myself and my tennis shoes on the treadmill downstairs where I can watch TV while working out. Actually our basement/family room is set up in such a way if all four of us are home, ONE of us HAS to be on the treadmill to watch TV....another good way to encourage fitness, even if a little drastic! But it definitely helps, I'm 41 years old with a bodyfat % of 19 and my blood pressure is 90/65...not too bad for a mom of two college students! : )

Here's my red outfit I'm wearing today...red is not the most flattering color on me (I own about 100 pink and royal blue things though!) but it's for a good cause. Mind you this is an amateur "selfie", my daughter is a little more skilled at this talent:

I do water the plant in the window BTW...she's been alive since June, not too bad for me! It's wild how they grow in the direction of the sun no matter where you put them. Til next time...

Breast Cancer Lobby Day Feb 7th!

Excited and a little nervous, I'll be joining several other ladies at the VBCF's Lobby on the Hill day Feb 7th with my friend Jennifer Welborn (she is the reigning National Ms.) to meet with legislators and others about several issues concerning health care and breast cancer testing/fundraising etc.

If you'd like to join us there's still room for volunteers to just come out and support the group and a lunch meeting will be afterwards at Extra Billy's, this is on a Thursday. Here's the link:

www.vbcf.org 

I'll post photos as soon as I can! Should be a fun and informative event :)

Back Again!

Wow, I had no idea it's been almost 2 years since my last blog post! A LOT has happened since then. Let's see:

• Both my children are now attending college full time
• My husband was promoted to management with UPS, so I am now Household CEO (He says it's a promotion for me too....but some days the laundry says differently!) 
• I completed my CPCU graduate program (finally, after 4 years!)
• We got two new kittens in exchange for the two kids leaving for college. They don't eat as much and the TV doesn't get left on. Well, ok, most nights...

I tied for the win at Mrs NC United States not long after my last post, winning the Interview award as well. It was a very empowering experience to do so well amongst a field of over two dozen ladies, 6 of whom were also former state or national winners in other systems like myself. That gave me the courage to continue my journey in pageants and I have gone on to win my first Supreme title in East Coast USA (Pro at that!) here in Virginia as well as winning the Queens Of Hope pageant, Delmarva's Ambassador and probably my favorite title to date, Royal Ambassador for Pink Queens For Life.

Here's the link to the article in the news and a photo with my sister queens: http://www.thefranklinnewspost.com/article.cfm?ID=22745

My involvement with Pink Queens for Life has made me realize that with a crown, there are indeed a LOT of doors that can open for service with a title. I initially entered just for fun and also because as a breast cancer survivor myself, I thought it was really neat that they recognized that sort of contestant as a category all its own. I never really expected to WIN...that was definitely an added bonus!

If I can begin the journey to reach out to others about the importance of this cause with just a local title like this, I can only imagine what doors would open with a state or even national crown...

Since winning Pink Queens, I have focused my efforts on working with other organizations that support those suffering from cancer, whether children at Roanoke Memorial or adults dealing with the after effects of a breast cancer diagnosis. Not only is my mother a survivor as well, but one of my best friends had to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction...a mother of teenagers like myself.

In watching them and realizing what I've felt and dealt with, I have found that perhaps I can share my ups and downs with others facing this disease after diagnosis and have hope that there can be light on the other side of that dark tunnel. I've been down it and I know how it feels to be terrified you're going to leave your children behind. So my "platform", as it were, is about as personal as it can get. And I hope to share some of that with those who read my blog over the next months as I work with others to find that sunshine after the storm that so many of us need. Stay tuned!